It's Incredibly Late (or Early..)

and I am incredibly wiped, so I won't be staying on long. I think I am going to take part of tomorrow morning 'off' from more sessions, so I can catch up on the blog and post my impressions for Saturday.

Emotionally I was in a bit of a better space, but things still 'hit' me every once and a while.. I think what is happening is that these conferences tend to throw me back to the 'what happened to Salamander'. And it is so God Dang painful to go back to that, to go back to how bad things were for such a long time and how a lot of the really bad stuff could have been, should have been avoided....

See, I don't really allow myself to 'go back in time' too much.. doing that serves no purpose, what is done is done, I can't change the past, all I can do is stay in the here and now, and use today, right now, this minute to do things I can do now.. and to then go forward from there..
I am not doing a very good job articulating this right now, I am beat.. I will either edit this post tomorrow, or add to better explain myself.

There were several awesome sessions today. Dr. Wakefield's story (The Lesser Truth) just absolutely blew me away (think Medical Suspense Thriller), and then of course, my personal highlight of this conference was Dr. Amy Yasko's marathon session this afternoon.

Now imagine my delight when in one of her presentation's Dr. Amy introduced The Invitation as 'one of her favorite poems'...
Now WHAT are the chances of that??? So I am pulling a post of mine about The Invitation to the top......

More coherent thoughts (Bwahahahaha!! Well, a girl can dream, can she not) later...

G'night..

###########

I think I finally stumbled upon the PERFECT articulation of my philosophy to life and my relationships with other human beings. This poem is ME, in every fiber of my being.

Excerpts from The Invitation by Oriah Mountain Dreamer that especially resonate...

I want to know if you can sit with pain

mine or your own

without moving to hide it

or fade it

or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy

mine or your own

if you can dance with wildness

and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes

without cautioning us

to be careful

to be realistic

to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me

is true.

I want to know if you can

disappoint another

to be true to yourself.

If you can bear the accusation of betrayal

and not betray your own soul.

If you can be faithless

and therefore trustworthy.

[..]

It doesn’t interest me

to know where you live or how much money you have.

I want to know if you can get up

after the night of grief and despair

weary and bruised to the bone

and do what needs to be done

to feed the children.

[..]

I want to know if you can be alone

with yourself

and if you truly like the company you keep

in the empty moments.

Peace...