So true...

(and that's what I've been trying to do since I last posted on Friday... learning to surf the *waves* instead of getting wiped out... and lemme tell you, there's a whole lot of falling off the darn board involved...)


Added at 11:25 am:
Ay, another wipe-out by a *wave* I didn't see coming...
And there seems to be a lot of what's expressed going around on the various blogs.

Summer time with kids on the spectrum is just so incredibly hard. I think most of us do a really good job at staying in the moment, only comparing how our kids are NOW to where they WERE. But then that school break comes along.. and with that the family and friends get-to-gethers, the increased unstructured social time, seeing packs of kids running around all day in your neighborhood...

All summer long, we get bombarded with situations where you can't help but notice that, no matter how far your child has come, they still have far to go compared to their neurotypical peers... And quite a few of us have to face up to the fact that our child may never catch up, that there may always be *stuff* that needs to be dealt with...

I remember talking on the phone with a dear friend about a year ago, and he was asking how our summer was going (and last summer was a tough one, having just started Step 2 of Dr. Amy's protocol with Salamander). And I fell silent as I could not find the words to express how torn up I was over the fact that I HAD to push through the truly horrendous detox Salamander was experiencing, that -I- had to *do this* to my child...

He *got* how much I was struggling to find the right words... And all he said was: "It must be SO hard." It took all I had to not start bawling in response...

Yes, it IS GD f#cking hard....

(Salamander woke up *totally mito* this morning, and just crashed. SHIT, SHIT, SHIT. No 10 year old boy should have to deal with this kind of crap when it is a gorgeous summer day and all the other kids are running around having a ball...)