Thursday, October 22, 2009

Just Another Day....

Call from Potatey's 1st grade teacher about an *incident* involving Potatey (yes, Potatey!!). Incident was substantial, we're working thru things. But boy, the combination of 1st grade and incident was enough to throw this momma right back into some really *difficult* (terrible, awful, no good, etc) 1st grade memories involving Salamander.

The joys of a pre-teen with virtually no filter on what comes out of his mouth, plunging headlong into puberty. Salamander yelling from the shower: "Mom, mom, come see. My b@lls are changing. They are no longer little acorns, they are now walnuts!!!"
Too bad.
If I can keep my composure through this (although a somewhat hysterical snort did escape me), so can you..

A lady commenting to me earlier today, that I was *giggly*.
OK, lady, you'd rather have me break out in maniacal laughter?? I can do that too, quite well actually...

Oh, and did I mention that my refrigerator croaked??

And that my trusted VW Jetta, now having exceeded 105,000 miles, is slowly falling apart on me?

Just another day, just another day....

Friday, October 16, 2009

The Winding (and Sometimes Twisted) Journey has turned into *Spinning wheels and ever so slowly sinking deeper and deeper into the muck*.



[am working on a 'this is where I'm at' post. Post won't be brave, won't be 'I'm hanging in', won't be 'I'll survive.", won't be "Things will get better.", won't be "the Silver Lining.". It will be on what is. Warts and all].

Boys are mostly good. Salamander is settling into Middle School well. He's definitely struggling with a few things, but nothing I hadn't expected or anticipated. His IEP and 3-year reeval are coming up shortly.. so I am planning on addressing these issues then (and in the mean time, I'll keep gathering my data..).

Potatey is having a really hard time.. which really really worries me. Very *ADHD* as of late. Not that he can't do the work.. he's whip smart.. blows through academic materials at home *just like that*. But at school? No focus, no ability to sit still, no *stick with it*ness. He's struggling making friends (which is really out of the norm for him). I need to figure out what's up.

Part of it may be that I simply haven't been as 'centered' myself (not that I am THAT centered.. but I am 'off my game', no doubt about that..). Part of it is that I've gotten a bit complacent on the rotation part of the boys' diets and I don't think that's agreeing with either of them. And then there is the change of seasons. And probably the biggest part? I started two new B12 forms (well, new for Potatey; Salamander has been on these forms for a while now) about 2 weeks ago. So I suspect part of the attention problem is just plain ole detox (yup, I have testing pending, but as I now run these thru my DAN! docs office as opposed to straight through Dr. Amy, to save a few $$, I am finding myself waiting FOREVER for the results.. GRRRRR).

Friday, October 09, 2009

Sorry for not having posted much.. I have plenty to write about, plenty to say, but just not enough time to put cohesive posts together.

Boys are doing OK.. settled into school... Salamander is doing really really well, Potatey is having a bit more trouble getting adjusted...which surprises me, and is something I need to keep an eye on.

Me? Hanging in. The boys keep me going, they are my reasons for getting out of bed in the morning.

I know, no I HAVE to hang on to believing, that sometime in the not too distant future all of the current B..S.. will come to an end. So I can pick up the pieces, and move forward. So I can be the best I can be for my boys.

In the mean time, all I can do is hang on, put what little pieces I can control in the proper place, make progress and complete what little things I can get resolution on.

Bottom line, XTB needs, no MUST, get a job. Unfortunately, unless I go the *gloves off* legal route at mucho $$$$, I can't make him. There is nothing I or the boys can do to have him snap out of *sulky little boy who is pitching a tantrum because things don't go his way* mode.

All I can do is do what I need to do to be able to take care of my precious boys on my own... and that's gonna take time...